


Where do I end, and where do you begin?

by Letmespeak



Category: Hamilton - Miranda
Genre: Alternate Universe - Soulmates, Multi, Platonic Soulmates, Romantic Soulmates, Soulmate-Identifying Marks, Soulmates
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-08-16
Updated: 2016-11-19
Packaged: 2018-08-09 05:30:40
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 6,502
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7788604
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Letmespeak/pseuds/Letmespeak
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>When Alexander took a bath when he was little, his mother would always trace the names with a sponge. She would start with George on his wrist, up to his elbow were Hercules was, then his shoulder were his mom would often kiss the name John, on his back Gilbert was written, Aaron right between his ribs, Angelica on his chest and lastly Thomas and Eliza side by side on his stomach.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

Alexander Hamilton had more names or soulmarks as they are also called, as the rest of his family combined. His father didn´t have any names and his mother had her little sister’s written in cursive on her upper arm.

“It doesn’t matter that me and your father aren’t soulmates” his mother would tell him “soulmates are like stars, your father is my moon”

Alexander would always frown when she said that. All other adults he knew would always tell him how his soulmates would mean everything to him. But they were all stupid because his mother told him otherwise and his mother was the smartest woman alive, Alexander knew that.

 

When Alexander took a bath when he was little, his mother would always trace the names with a sponge. She would start with George on his wrist, up to his elbow were Hercules was, then his shoulder were his mom would often kiss the name John, on his back Gilbert, Aaron right between his ribs, Angelica on his chest and lastly Thomas and Eliza side by side on his stomach.

“My little lion, you are going to have so much love in your life”

After his father left it became his mother´s battle cry. She would whisper it to herself as often as she could often when she thought Alexander couldn’t hear her. Until one day she wasn’t around to say it anymore.

-

Thomas had never been overly fan of his relatives’ dinner parties. They were filled with people way to excited to be able to socialize with people richer then them. He ended up sitting alone with a glass of French wine as far away as possible from where the action where. Somehow his cousin still found him.

“Thomas! Why are you hiding here?” Thomas forced a smile.

“Just wanted to have a little break.” His cousin laughed like it was the funniest he had heard. God, what a tool.

“Good old Thomas” He really tried not to flinch of the tone in his voice.

“Have you met your third cousin? She is Bathurst Skelton’s widow and quit the looker”

Thomas wanted to roll his eyes but it would be in polite to the young woman behind his cousin back.

She stepped forward with a wide smile. She seemed quit cheerful for a widow.

“Lovely to meet you. I am Thomas” Her smile widened. She looked back on her cousin as to get permission. She straightened her back before saying with the clearest voice in the world, the words that Jefferson would always remember.

“I am Martha”

(Thomas dropped his wine glass)

-

Eliza(beth) Schuyler adored her elder sister more then anything in the world, therefore it was only fitting that they didn’t only share blood but a soulmate and also were each others soulmates. Eliza had three names decorating her, Angelica on her wrist and on her stomach _Alexander_ and _Thomas_ side by side. Her sister on the other hand had two names _Elizabeth_ on her wrist and _Alexander_ on her chest.

One of Eliza's favorite pastimes when she was younger was to sit together with Angelica and tell stories about how their soulmates would be. Angelica found the game extremely boring and would always spice things up with adding a dash of adventure to Eliza´s romance. Her favorite story was the story about how Alexander and Thomas were two rivaling pirates that fought over the control of the ocean and her heart. In those stories she told herself her Alexander was always a different man then Angelica’s Alexander. Even though Eliza knew that it was a small possibility. Everyone who had ever loved Eliza had loved Angelica too (often more then they had loved her). Why would Alexander be any different?

At least she had Thomas for herself.

-

Thomas looked down on his new daughter. She was a fragile little thing born way to early.

“Mr. Jefferson” Thomas turned around and faced one of his servants, “Mrs. Jefferson has asked for you”

His dear Martha is lying in bed. She is paler and smaller then he has ever seen her.

“Thomas” Martha tries to push herself up to speak to her husband.

“Darling, don´t waste your strength” Thomas walked to his wife's side. He sat down on the chair next to his wife.

Martha laid back into the soft bed.

“I am going to die today” Thomas grabbed his wife´s hand and kissed it.

“Don't say those things darling. We will get the best doctors in the country. You won't die” Martha´s eyes filled with tears. She freed her hand from her husband´s grip and pushed her dress down to show her collarbone where _Thomas_ is written in his handwriting.

“Thomas, I am going to die today” Jefferson opened his mouth to protest “Don't interrupt me” Even when at the brink of death she managed to scowl him. God, he loved this woman. Jefferson closed his mouth.

“I have always known that I will go before you, considering you have more then my name decorating your skin” Jefferson looked down. Martha had always disliked the fact that her husband was decorated with more then one name _. John_ for John Adams on his arm, _Martha_ for her on his collarbone, and neatly on his stomach _Elizabeth_ and _Alexander_. It was especially _Elizabeth_ that his wife disliked.

“I can not ask of you to never love again,” Martha took a deep breath, “I am the first soulmate you met and you may find it selfish that I don´t think that is enough, but I want to ask you to never remarry” Martha grabbed his shirt, forcing him to look at her.

“I will do whatever you want” Thomas loved Martha more thing anything and

Martha smiled at him. She closed her eyes. She died with a smile across her lips and gripping his shirt rights were _Elizabeth_ was written.

-

Peggy was whispering in Eliza’s ear about the different soldiers that had spoken to so far that night.

“They were all really nice, sadly none of them were my Stephan” Eliza smiled at her younger sister.

“You don´t have to be in such a rush. Neither me or Angelica have met our soulmates yet.” Peggy nodded paying little attention to her sisters considering that a group of new soldiers had arrived. It was five men, the shortest of them caught Eliza’s eye. He had sleek black hair and a tan complexion. He was talking to one of the other soldiers that Eliza recognized as Aaron Burr. The soldier’s eyes swiped across the room and when it, for a brief second stopped to look at the Schuyler sisters, Eliza could feel her heart skipping a beat. Eliza turned to her older sister.

“You see him over there?”

Angelica followed Eliza´s gaze to the new soldier.

“Yes, what about him?”

Eliza dragged Angelica a little closer before whispering to her.

“I think he might be one of mine…”

Angelica leaned away. Her younger sisters eyes were filled with hope and a small smile.

“Did you hear his name? Is he called Alexander or Thomas?”

Eliza looked down on the floor.

“Well, I don´t know his name but…”

Eliza felt something stirring in her stomach. A feeling she couldn’t explain, something her heart knew before her brain did.

“But what?”

Angelica didn’t get any wiser by looking into Eliza’s dreaming eyes.

“You are absolutely helpless, you know that?”

The comment that normally would have made Eliza blushed seemed to have gone over her head. Eliza was still staring at the soldier.

“I will help you,”

Eliza seemed to regain interest in her sister.

“I will go over there and find out if he is the Alexander or Thomas you have been waiting for dear sister”

Before Eliza could protest Angelica was making her way across the room. An unpleasant thought crept into Eliza’s mind, what if this is **The** Alexander not only hers but also her sister’s soulmate? What if, after meeting Angelica, Alexander wouldn’t be interested in the younger, quieter sister?

She was almost to engulfed in this thought to notice that Angelica was now standing in front of her with the soldier in tow.

“This is my sister Elizabeth Schuyler.”

The man looked surprised.

“Elizabeth with an z?”

It was a small smile playing on the man’s lips and Eliza had to resist the notion to squeal with delight.

“My name is Alexander Hamilton. Alexander with an x”

Alexander took her hand and kissed it.

Eliza was as hypnotized by the sight before her. Maybe it was the glass of wine she had zipped earlier but she said something brash.

“Where is Elizabeth written on you?” Alexander´s eyes widened a little, “cause you do have it written on you, don´t you?”

Eliza thanked god that she hadn´t accidently said please at the end of that sentence.

Alexander chuckled and Eliza´s heart jumped again.

“Yes I do, right here” he pointed to his stomach.

“Well, Mr. Hamilton it seems like we are soulmates” Eliza smiled the goofiest smile she had but I didn`t matter because the man in front of her was her perfect match “I have been waiting for you”

“If it takes fighting a war for us to meet it would have been worth it”

Angelica, that had kept herself in the background, cleared her throat.

“I’ll leave you too it”

-

With every letter that arrived she compared his handwriting to the one on her stomach, it was always a perfect match.

-

Alexander could say with a great deal of confidence that the site in front of him was the most beautiful he had ever seen. His new wife in only her smallclothes unbuttoning his shirt while kissing her way down his torso.

She stopped at his stomach, he could feel her running her fingers over the names that was written there.

“Thomas” she whispered, Alexander don’t think he was supposed to hear it.

He looked down on his wife who was nearly hypnotized by the name on his stomach.

“Betsy, I know you are new to what happens in a marriage bed, but husbands don’t usually like it when their wives says a other man’s name” Eliza looked up. She blushed slightly.

“Apologies” Alexander cut her off before she could continue.

“You don’t have to apologies.” Eliza smiled at him.

“It is just that I too have Thomas written on my stomach” Alexander eyes widened “same placement, same size even same handwriting”

Alexander smiled.

“Seems like we share a soulmate, but I don’t think I am going to like him very much”

Eliza seemed confused. “Why?”

“Because we haven’t even meet him yet and already he is taking away precious time I could spend with my wife”

Eliza laughed as Alexander leaned down to kiss her.

-

“It is a lovely day is isn’t it?” Thomas placed his teacup down on the table that he shared with Angelica Schuyler Church. She was currently reading a letter that one of her maids had handed to her. “Maybe, if you looked up from that darn letter you would notice it?”

Angelica looked up.

“I am sorry. It is from my brother-in-law. He writes novels and calls them letters” Angelica smiled down on the letter. Thomas raised his eyebrow. He had heard in the past that The Schuyler sister was extremely fond of her brother-in-law, maybe a little to _fond_.

“Your sister and your brother-in-law, I have heard about the Hamiltons not enough to paint a clear picture of them thought”

To be honest the Virginian knew nearly nothing about one of the new power-couples in American. He would make sure to catch up when he got home. Angelica started to tell him about her sister and her husband. Thomas listened with only one ear, usually his conversations with Angelica was filled with politics and heated debates. It was a nice contrast to the conversation they were having now. Almost completely one-sided.

“But, anyway so Elizabeth and Alexander was talki-“

Thomas nearly fell out of his chair. Angelica stopped talking and looked over at him. She looked like a question mark.

“Alexander and Elizabeth?” Thomas´s voice came out higher then usual.

“Yes, my brother-in-law and my sister. My sister prefers Eliza though” Angelica seemed ready to return to her story when Thomas interrupted her one more time.

He leaned over the table. “Sorry, but just so we are clear. Alexander with an x and Elizabeth with an z?” Thomas had never seen anyone so confused in his entire life before.

“I don’t see why this is relevant to the conversation, but yes” Angelica seemed inpatient to return to her story.

“I am so sorry Mrs. Church, but I just remembered that I have something important to do” Thomas didn’t hear her reply. He just stood up and got out of there as quickly as possible.

The first thing Thomas did when he returned home was to take of his shirt. He looked down at his brown stomach _Alexander_ with an x and _Elizabeth_ with a z was there as it had been since he was born.

-

Alexander Hamilton was

  1. An orphan
  2. A immigrant
  3. A federalist



Eliza(beth) Schuyler Hamilton is

  1. Kind and motherly (according to Angelica)
  2. Trusting (according to Angelica)
  3. A federalist’s wife



Jefferson always thought clearer when he wrote things down and looking over his list it was clear. It was simply impossible for either to be his soulmate.

-

Alexander Hamilton was worse in person then Thomas could have imagined. He was an angry little beast in human form. He was short, with an obnoxious green coat that made Jefferson see red. Within the first minutes of meeting him, Alexander “I am better then you” Hamilton had already interrupted the president _twice_ and picked a fight with the Virginian.

The debate that follows was filled with childish remarks, unimportant arguments and unfounded reasoning. Thomas can feel his heartbeat rising and his face turning red during the debate. The man in front of him seems to have found the perfect way to rill him up. Thomas nearly loses his cool more then once and if Washington hadn’t been there he is sure either him or Hamilton would have gotten physical.

When Thomas leaves his heart is beating twice as fast as usual and he has two more things to add to the list of Alexander Hamilton.

  1. The most annoying person he has **ever**
  2. Definitely not his soulmate



-

When Alexander comes home to Eliza waiting for him at the dinner table. When she sees him she clutches her cup a little tighter with excitement waiting for him to either comfier or disprove their theory.

“He is not our soulmate.” Alexander sees his wife lose her smile as he says the words he has known since the debate.

“Are you sure?” Eliza looks at him with pleading eyes. Ever since her sister had written about Thomas Jefferson in her letters Eliza had been sure he was their missing soulmate.

“He is an obnoxious plantation owner and disapproves of all my policies suggestions! He can’t possibly be my soulmate!”

Eliza stands up and puts her arms around Alexander.

“He can’t possible be _our_ soulmate”

-

“Excuse me, miss?” the woman in front of him had just lost her book in the street and didn’t seem to notice. Thomas raced forward and tapped the woman on the shoulder.

The woman turned around. She was shorter then Thomas by quit a bit. She had long sleek black hair and dark eyes that hypnotized Thomas.

“Can I help you, Mr. Secretary?” That she knew his position stopped him for a movement. Thomas quickly regained his wits. He was Secretary of State, of course she recognized him.

“You dropped you book, miss” Thomas turned the book over in his hand so he could see the title, Common Sense by Thomas Paine.

The woman in front of him gave him a faint smile. Jefferson pretended not to notice how his heart made a leap.

“I know it is late to read it. We have already won the revolution, no reason to start a new one,” she laughed a little bit. She fixed the skirt on her dress slightly. The Virginian hadn´t notice it was crooked. Her dress was a deep blur color that helped bring out her complexion.

“But, my sister treats it as it is the bible so I thought I should give it a chance” She looked down at his hands. Jefferson realized he still hadn’t handed it over.

“It is a great book” Thomas gave her the book. Their fingers brushed slightly.

“Can I ask you for a favor, miss?” She looked up at him through her dark eyelashes.

“Can you tell me your name?” She started laughing. She put her hand forward for him to shake.

“My name is Elizabeth”

For a movement it was like the world stopped. The only thing that mattered was the woman in front of him. He wondered if she could feel it too.

“Thomas. My name is Thomas” She smiled at him.

“I know. You work with my husband, Alexander, after all”

(For a brief moment Thomas swear he could hear a wine glass breaking)


	2. Sometimes it is about what you don't/can't/doesn't say

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sometimes marriage is about what you don’t say.
> 
> Sometimes a conversation is about the things you can’t say.
> 
> It is a lot of things she doesn't want to tell her husband these days.

Her meeting with Thomas Jefferson had filled Eliza’s mind until she came home. She rushed up to Alexander’s office to tell him.

“Alexander, you will never guess who I met?” Alexander turned around. He had a irritated look on his face.

“Really, Betsy? I am working!” Eliza lost some of her courage.

“But-“

“But what!” Alexander snapped.

“Nothing” He just needed time, she told herself when she closed the door. When he is finished she can tell him about the meeting.

-

 

Alexander laid in bed with his wife drawing patterns on his stomach. _As it should be_.

That summer had been nothing like it should have been. Alexander should have been with his wife. Alexander should have never opened the door that night. And Alexander should have been smarter then to have done the same mistake multiply times. But, there was no reason to dwell on that any longer. Because it was fall and he laid in bed with his soulmate, his _Eliza_. And what happened that summer didn’t need to be remembered.

Eliza had started stroking a familiar territory on his stomach. She was examining her name on his stomach, the same way he himself had done in the begging of their relationship where he had compared her handwriting with the one on his stomach.

After a while, her eyes drifted towards _Thomas._

“Did you ever imagine what your soulmates would be like?”

Her voice was soft like a feather.

“No, I didn’t. And even in my wildest fantasies I could not have imagined someone as wonderful as you”

He smiled at her. She smiled back. Just _as it should be._

“I would talk to Angelica and Peggy for hours about you and our Thomas.”

He nodded along.

“If you had to imagine, who do you think he is?”

She looked up on him trough her eyelashes.

He just laughs and leans down to kiss her.

He doesn’t tell her his answer. Because his answer would make more harm then good.

His answer is simple; _Thomas is the man you will leave me for when you find out how I betrayed you._

~~Sometimes marriage is about what you don’t say.~~

-

“A meeting with Hamilton” Jefferson tried to speak as nonchalantly as he could.

“I know you hate him but, let’s hear what he has to say”

Madison’s raised his eyebrow.

“Are we speaking about the same Hamilton?” The look in the Virginian’s eye was straight up judgmental.

“I know it is not ideal but, Hamilton practically begged me for the meeting. Sadly I didn’t have the heart to turn him down. ”

Jefferson folded his hands in his lap. He was sweating; Madison’s approval was the only thing standing between him and a private meeting with the husband of his (possible) soulmate.

“Maybe,” Madison leaned forward his chair, “we can solve one problem with another and win a victory for the Southerns, in other words-“

“Oh-“ It wasn’t difficult to understand what James referred too. Congress hadn’t had a debate about other things then the capital for months.

“Wouldn’t you like to work a little closer to home?”

Madison tone was neutral. He had always been good at hiding his true emotions, Jefferson not that much.

Thomas thought about the proposition. It would be a small victory compared to Hamilton’s.

A capital close to his beloved Virginia was not enough for him to ruin his beloved America’s economic future. But this debate could rip America apart before it even properly began. Killing two birds with one stone wouldn’t exactly be bad for America either.

Getting the capital to Virginia was also doable, considering George Washington was from Mount Vernon.

“Actually I would”

Madison smiled a knowing smile. Few people actually knew how much of a manipulating bastard he was. God, Jefferson loved that man.

“Well, I propose the Potomac”

The Potomac, a good place.

-

Arranging the seating of three people turned out to be a lot harder then it seemed. Mostly because Thomas really wanted to sit somewhere he didn’t have to look at Hamilton, but the Virgian admitted to himself it was difficult to discuss with someone if you couldn’t see him or her.

Alexander Hamilton arrived exactly as planned at 9pm outside the restaurant. He was wearing the most obnoxious green coat Jefferson had ever seen.

His hair was loose and shined in the dim lighting. He probably hadn’t washed it in a week, Jefferson tried his best to hide his disgust. He did a horrible job in doing so.

The dinner went well enough.

At least that was what Madison told him afterwards. During the dinner all Thomas could see was Hamilton. How Hamilton would smile that no-good smile of his. How Hamilton leaned over the table. How Hamilton’s sleeve would rise and show of a short glance of ink on his wrist. The Virgian wondered if Elizabeth was written there on his wrist. If it was even written on Alexander at all!

Because he can’t possible share a soulmate with this man, could he?

Phillip Schuyler had always been a proud man. Would he really give his daughter to a broke immigrant that wasn’t even her soulmate?

The dinner was one for the history books. A historic agreement.

Too bad that if you ask Thomas Jefferson what happened in that room, he could only response in how Alexander Hamilton had looked and not what he had said.

But, nobody would ever need to know that.

-

“I hate that guy”

The three leading men from the Democratic Republican party was not drunk, but on the verge of it. At least that was what Thomas said to himself as he drank his third beer.

“Wow, Aaron Burr with a real opinion. That must happened ones every full moon”

Thomas laughed at Madison’s joke.  
“I still can’t believe he is my soulmate” Aaron mumbled it into his glass, but Jefferson picked it up.

“What?!”

Aaron pointed to his ribs.

“Right here, _Alexander._ He isn’t my only soulmate, I also have my wife’s name. And Hamilton has millions of names on him. Eliza, Angelica, John, George, I could go one for hours”

Madison patted Burr on the back.

“Fate is a cruel thing”

Burr just nodded. Jefferson finished his beer. A question was going around in his mind and he just couldn’t ask.

_Is one of his soulmates Thomas?_

~~Sometimes a conversation is about the things you can’t say.~~

“We will find something on him. Anything. Anything. And then we can prove he is a crock”

-

Hamilton was in front of them. He looked almost strong where he stood. Thomas doesn’t think he could have stood as tall if someone had accused him of abusing his powers.

“Ha! You don’t even know what you’re asking me to confess!” Hamilton leaned forward and put his finger in Jefferson’s face.

“Confess!”

Hamilton turned to Burr.

“You have nothing. I don’t have to tell you anything at all” Hamilton started shrinking slightly “Unless”

Alexander continued talking, but Jefferson zoned out. Because Hamilton was holding a letter in his hands. A letter that according to him would prove his innocents.

And if that were true, they would have to start over.

Burr grabbed the letter. He read it out loud.

“What?” Jefferson interrupted him. The letter didn´t make any sense. It had to be some sort of cover up story. Hamilton couldn’t have… He can’t possible be so…

Alexander started to explain himself. Jefferson could only hear half of it, she had courted him, escorted him to bed. And Alexander had been weak. He hadn’t said no. And what about his wife.

“My god” Jefferson spoke ones again.

 _Eliza._ Sweet Eliza. Did she know?

Madison grabbed his arm.

“Let’s go” Jefferson didn’t need to be tolled twice.

“So?” It was Hamilton’s voice. And for the first time since the revelation Jefferson actually looked at him. He had never seen him so small. His hair was a mess and his cloths askew. Thomas could see a letter sticking out from underneath the shirt a capital _A_. For the first time Jefferson wanted to rip Alexander’s shirt right off and search. Search for _Elizabeth,_ search for the name of that woman _Maria_ and search for his own _Thomas._ This man had made him insane.

“The people won’t know what we know” Madison spoke and Jefferson nodded.

(He couldn’t see anything except Eliza’s bright smile when she had said “My husband, Alexander)

-

Eliza scrubbed her skin.

Scrubbed and scrubbed and cried.

Fire had removed his writing from paper but scrubbing didn’t remove it from her skin.

-

 

The Reynolds Pamphlet was everywhere it was impossible to escape the news of Alexander Hamilton´s torrid affair with Maria Reynolds. But Jefferson had to admit he hadn’t excepted to see one of the stars of the scandal on his front steep.

Alexander Hamilton was wearing some sort of disguise, an old green coat and big hat.

“What are you doing here?” Jefferson stopped in front of his stairs staring at the small man in front of him.

Hamilton practically jumped up from the stairs. His hat nearly fell off from the sudden movement.

“YOU! This is all your fault!” Hamilton pointed a finger straight up in Jefferson´s face. Jefferson resisted the will to laugh at the site before him. Hamilton with a hat that fit better in the trash then anywhere else and a desperate expression on his face.

“Me? Hamilton, did you really think I want to take credit for something _you_ wrote?”

Hamilton looked like a balloon that had just been tapped for air. Hamilton sat down looking defeated and Jefferson hadn´t even started to properly argue. _Man_ , he was really out of his game tonight.

“You know the difference between you and me?” Jefferson sat down next to Alexander before he continued “I don’t respond to rumors that only three people know about”

It was harsh but Jefferson needed to say something so that Alexander could wake up and argue. Hamilton seemed to fall even further down. Jefferson frowned.

“And if I could give you a advice, cherish the time you have with your wife. Mine was taken away from me way to soon” Jefferson´s mouth wasn’t his own anymore it just continued talking, and here he was with Hamilton discussing Martha. What has happened with the world? “According to you sister-in-law Elizabeth Schuyler is the best thing that has happened to you. So go home and make sure that every scarifies you make for the rest of your life is for your wife.”

Alexander stood up, making no signs that he had heard what Jefferson had said, and slowly started walking away. Jefferson decided to sit a little longer enjoying the silence.

-

He saw her in the street. Her long dark hair was pulled away from her face. Her head was held high and every fiber in his body wanted to go over to her and talk to her.

So he does and he forgets to stop.  

“I am terribly sorry, Mrs. Hamilton” Jefferson picks up the basket she lost when he bumped into her. Eliza takes the basket from him. She doesn’t even look at him.

“Goodbye, Mr. Secretary. I have to go home to my husband.”

(He can see Hamilton’s silly smile in his mind. He hates it)

-

She doesn’t tell her husband that she ran into his biggest political enemy at the market.

~~It is a lot of things she doesn't want to tell her husband these days.~~

Anyway what was she going to say? I ran into one of the men who is responsible for you publishing your affair in the newspaper, also he walked right into me. Like he hasn’t embarrassed me enough.

But, if she spoke to Alexander he would smile his silly smile and he would start talking. Eliza had always been weak for Alexander’s words. Ever since she was old enough to read the handwriting on her stomach (the skin around the letters are visibly red after all the scrubbing but **_Alexander_** is still as bold and clear as ever). She fell in love with his words in his letters (now burned to ash). And when the got married and she was afraid she had fallen in love with handwriting he turned out to be just as eloquent with his mouth as he was with his hands.

She doesn’t need to think about that right now.

Where is Phillip?

Last she saw him he was going down to Broadway.

-

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey! This is the second chapter! I know this was only going to be a two chapter fic but I promise the next is going to be the last. Please tell me what you think in the comments. My tumblr is let-me-ski (please come and talk to me there).  
> Some things I can clear up, yes this chapter starts right after Alexander has had an affair with Maria and right before Phillip's death.


	3. All she could feel was pain

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> George (his brilliant mind belonged to George. All his ideas), Hercules (his boyish humor belonged to Hercules. They had stayed up nights laughing,), John (his ambitions belonged to John. They would talk for hours about what they would do together when the revolution was over), Gilbert (his lust for adventure belonged to Lafayette), Angelica (Every time he thought almost, next time, maybe he thought of Angelica. All the roads he didn’t take were hers), Thomas (it was a time he thought Thomas belonged to his and Eliza’s future. Now he didn’t know where Thomas would fit inn) and Eliza (His heart, body and soul belonged to Eliza, whether she wanted it or not).

Jefferson had a quiet morning, well at least until he read the paper:

_“Phillip Hamilton killed in duel after taking his father´s advice”_

Jefferson read the article three times before putting the paper down. He looked down on his stomach were he knew that _Elizabeth_ and _Alexander_ was written. Maybe if he wished hard enough _Alexander_ would disappear and only _Elizabeth_ would be left.  
Then he could go uptown to the Hamilton’s house and then maybe he could convince Eliza Schuyler Hamilton that he was her soulmate and he could get her far away from all of this suffering that seems to follow her.

It was two big holes in his plan:

  1. Eliza Schuyler _Hamilton_ was loyal to fault; she had already proven that with sticking to Alexander even after the Reynolds scandal.
  2. Just thinking about the plan, he could hear Martha´s voice “never remarry, please”



-

All she could feel was pain.

-

If he had known.

If Alexander had known he would have gone back in time and thrown Maria Reynolds out of his home.

Even better he would have never opened the door for Maria Reynolds. If he had never opened the door, he would have never have met her. If he had never met her Maria Reynolds, he would have never cheated on his wife. If he had never cheated on his wife, he would never have written the Reynolds pamphlet. If he had never written the Reynolds pamphlet, George Eacker wouldn’t have criticized him. If Eacker had never criticized him, Phillip wouldn’t have dueled him. And if Phillip hadn’t dueled Eacker, Phillip would have been alive. And Eliza would have smiled. And that was all needed right now. His wife’s happiness. Because Eliza’s happiness was infectious, if she was happy he was happy.

But that wouldn’t happen because he let that woman inside their home, their bed.

If he had been smart back then when it started he would have remembered his soulmates.

But he didn’t. That was the thing about his and Maria’s arrangement. It didn’t feel real. Like he was in a universe where you couldn’t tell whom people belonged to just by looking at their bodies. Alexander started tracing the names that decorated him, just like his mother used to do.

 _George_ (his brilliant mind belonged to George. All his ideas) _, Hercules_ (his boyish humor belonged to Hercules. They had stayed up nights laughing,) _, John (_ his ambitions belonged to John. They would talk for hours about what they would do together when the revolution was over) _, Gilbert_ (his lust for adventure belonged to Lafayette), _Angelica_ (Every time he thought almost, next time, maybe he thought of Angelica. All the roads he didn’t take were hers) _, Thomas (_ it was a time he thought Thomas belonged to his and Eliza’s future. Now he didn’t know where Thomas would fit inn) _and Eliza_ (His heart, body and soul belonged to Eliza, whether she wanted it or not) _._

-

The days seemed longer. The sun didn’t give any heat. And Eliza hadn’t looked down on her stomach for months. Her heart simply couldn’t take it.

Forgiveness is difficult.

She can’t look at her children anymore. They all fit into one of two categories: The ones that look like Alexander and the ones that look like Phillip.

After a while she stops shooing Alexander out of the room.

She lets him talk to her. She doesn’t respond, but it is nice. And he talks almost like he used to before all of this happened.

He loves her. Eliza knows that.

Forgiveness is difficult, but the situation they are in now is more demanding then anything the universe had thrown on them earlier. And Eliza was not stupid, she had grown up with two sisters, she knew that troubling times demanded companionship.

So one afternoon she took his hand when he talked to her and for a brief second the world seemed normal again.

-

Running for president was one way of distracting yourself Jefferson found out. It was no one who seemed better to get his mind of everything like that Aaron Burr. Burr used to be a necessary evil. Now he was an inconvenience.

“Hamilton’s support is what you will need to win” Madison whispered in his ear as they watched Hamilton and Burr arguing.

Jefferson had one thing Burr didn’t, absolutely nothing to lose. His legacy would be preserved whether he won or not. He did write the damn declaration of independence. His soulmates were all dead, unreachable or he had pushed them away (he and John had been running a damn good smear campaign against each other. He was going to miss that old, stubborn bastard). His daughters were grown and married to good matches. He had nothing to loose.

Hamilton was still wearing black mourning clothes. His hair was as greasy as ever and his eyes had never looked more tired. Jefferson watched their conversation from the background. He considered talking to Alexander, but when he was about to make his presence known Elizabeth Schuyler Hamilton walked forwards and grabbed her husband’s arm. The Schuyler Sister was wearing a long black dress and her hair was in a simple bun on her head. The married couple shared a small smile as Alexander placed his hand on her growing stomach. Thomas had heard the news that the Hamiltons expected another child. It was still strange to see a man and a woman that had been so broken not that long ago in such an intimate moment of happiness.

He decided against stepping forward to talk to them. They deserved to be alone.

Anyway, if he knew Burr right the Senator had probably hurt his own chances with Hamilton by talking to him more then he had helped himself.

-

A smiling Angelica Schuyler Church delivered the news of Phillip Hamilton II birth to him.

Jefferson smiled back at her because everyone knew the Schuyler Sisters smiles were infectious.

-

When Thomas Jefferson became president of the United States of America, he also became the first to take the oath without a dutiful wife by his side. He thought of Martha when he swore the oath. He had kept his promise to Martha and he would keep his promise to the American people.

-

Thomas remembers every detail of the day Martha died. The color of the sky, what he had eaten for breakfast, when he woke up, absolutely everything about that day was preserved in his memory.

The day he found out Alexander had been shot was completely different. It was a blur. He couldn’t remember who had told him or how he had managed to find the Hamiltons’ home. All he remembers from the journey there was how he had cursed Aaron Burr to hell a million times. When he finally arrived to where Hamilton was ~~lying~~ dying. He had stopped and looked in the window. Hamilton was in bed surrounded by friends and family. He recognized some of the Hamilton children and he saw Angelica and John Church clutching each other in the background.

Hamilton on the other hand was only watching his wife. And he could blame hm. Eliza was a sight for sore eyes, even burdened by sorrow she looked like an angel.

He saw Hamilton whispering to her. He couldn’t tell what it was because Hamilton spoke so quickly. Typical, even on his deathbed he couldn’t shut up.

And when Alexander leaned forward to kiss his wife one last time, Thomas could feel his whole world stopping. Because when Hamilton moved forward you could see his chest and on his chest _Thomas_ was written in _his_ handwriting.

Jefferson had of course had suspicions about the Federalist being his soulmate, but her was the final puzzle piece. There was no doubt anymore.

Alexander Hamilton, immigrant, orphan, and federalist was Thomas Jefferson’s soulmate.

(This time there was no sound of glass breaking. It was like everything had gone silent for Jefferson to process the situation)

He left the Hamilton home. He doesn’t remember anything from the way home either.

Everything was blurry. And later in the evening he got the news he had excepted the entire day. Alexander Hamilton was dead. _His soulmate._

His soulmate was dead.

He always thought clearer when he wrote things down. He found the list he had written in Paris when he had first heard about the Hamilton’s and decided to add a couple points.

 **My soulmates** by Thomas Jefferson

Martha Wayles was

  1. My wife
  2. The mother of my four children
  3. The only one who could make me laugh for hours
  4. The only woman I will ever marry



John Adams is

  1. My best friend
  2. One of the smartest men I have ever had the pleasure of meeting
  3. Someone I would trust with my life
  4. A man that currently despises me



Eliza(beth) Schuyler Hamilton is

  1. Kind and motherly ~~(according to Angelica)~~ According to everyone who has ever had the pleasure of meeting her.
  2. Trusting ~~(according to Angelica)~~ According to everyone who has ever had the pleasure of meeting her.
  3. A federalist’s ~~wife~~ widow
  4. Forgiving
  5. My soulmate



Alexander Hamilton ~~is~~ was

  1. An orphan
  2. A immigrant
  3. A federalist
  4. The most annoying person I have **ever**
  5. ~~Definitely not~~ my soulmate



**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Finally finished!  
> Tell me what you think in the comments and please leave kudos if you like it.

**Author's Note:**

> Hey! Hope you liked this. English is not my first language so I know it is some mistakes. Please tell me and I will correct them. I have no idea if the timeline fits to the fic. This fic is based on an au I have written on tumblr. Also if you want to talk to me about Hamilton, my tumblr is @let-me-ski.  
> Yes I wrote that John Adams is one of Jefferson's soulmates. They had this crazy long friendship, even dying on the same day. Stephan was Peggy's real life husband btw.  
> Please tell me what you think.


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